The Onion rules the universe
Nov. 8th, 2007 10:04 amOldie but goodie from chris g.:
As Homer Simpson once said, "It's funny because it's true."
Everything In Entire World Now Collectible
KIRKLAND, WA–In this suburb of Seattle, a man stops off for bread and milk on his way home from work. He's excited about his purchases, but not because he's hungry.
"This is awesome," said Marvin Humboldt, 46, lovingly holding his grocery purchases. "I've finally got the full run of the Wonder Bread 'NFL Legends' bags. And this gallon of 2% milk has a red dot on the cap, which means it's a first-run factory proof."
Halfway across the country, in Des Moines, IA, 34-year-old Janine Tompkins buys a bucket of Dutch Boy interior paint. She's not planning to do any home redecorating, though.
"This is the semi-gloss latex," Tompkins said. "Dutch Boy only made 12,500 of these in eggshell white this year. This one's definitely going straight into the display cabinet."
According to a report issued Monday by the North American Collector's Association, every single thing currently being manufactured is officially categorized as a collectible.
"It used to be that only certain particularly noteworthy or rare items, like Fantastic Four #1 or a 1952 Topps Mickey Mantle card, were considered valuable collector's items. That's no longer the case," NACA president Bob Gunther said. "If you have any objects of any kind in your home, in your garage, or on the floor of your car, don't throw them away. They could be worth big money someday. In fact, they're probably worth a lot of money right now."
Do you have a Taco Bell "Defeat The Dark Side... And Win!" cardboard cup-top playing piece from the restaurant's 1999 tie-in sweepstakes for Star Wars: Episode I lying around somewhere? Chances are you do, because more than 80 million of them were made. But don't throw it out: According to the March issue of Game-Piece Buyer's Guide, it's worth $295....
As Homer Simpson once said, "It's funny because it's true."