Since the signal for out Stolen Intarnets is strong on the balcony tonight, we'll try to make sense of our Epcot Experience. Basically, Mr. Tiki remembered this park fondly from baby-hood, so we decided to spend a pleasant afternoon.
The experience started off pleasant enough, with Mission Space! And the whole fact that it had made people literally drop dead just added frisson.
Though we're still kinda pissed at Lt. Dan for leaving our asses up on Mars (after we'd completed the mission, we repeat, WITHOUT a navigator, and we're not sure about the feasibility of space travel lacking a partner to slur, "Captain, I need more powerrrrrr!!!"), we had drowned our sorrows at the Cokes of the World place.
Since our Fast Pass for Soarin' wasn't valid for several hours hence, it was then on to the countries.
Mr. Tiki read out the list of Dizznified Epcot countries, and, being the picky sort, we perseverated on the quirks: besides Thailand and China, it appears that, within Dizzney property, "Africa" also qualifies as a country. (Oddly, no AIDS-plagued develping nation had prioritized providing funds towards getting an exhibit in Orlando). Since Germany was represented, many happy hours were enjoyed making tasteless jokes about the demise of an imaginary adjoining Poland exhibit.
One realization, amongst just the tiki component of the group, was that we had actually (in real life and carrying real luggage that is) travelled to almost every one of the real
countries represented by the cheesy Small World-ified exhibits. Our skepticism detector increased when Tommy revealed, upon our questioning the somewhat odd selection of coutries in the Epcot park, that the exhibits were in fact paid for by the respective tourism bureaus of the countries in questions.
One of the countries in question was Canada. Now, we love Canada as much as the next man, and what we love most is poking gentle fun at our beloved neighbors in North Montana, who reciprocate by taking our humor in great stride. And, we should mention, the very fact that a country should stand apart due to the fact that the people are so bloody nice
is possibly something of which its citizens should take some pride. But, dude, you have a world showcase, and out of a half dozen candidates to represent the diversity of Planet Earth and it's denizens....Canada??
We asked our living guidebook for further information regarding the Canada exhibit. For once, the man who could tell you not only the name of the ride that stood in the park before
the ride that came before current ride, but the date it was replaced, the reason, and the name of the Imagineer in question's third cousin on his mother's side, was pulled up short. He hemmed. He hawed. Come on, a Canada showcase? Do all the clerks say "Eh" a lot? Or what? "Um," Tommy began. "You can get English candy there!"
Somewhat later, we went on the jolly Viking ride sponsored by Norwegian cruise lines. It involves animatronic trolls, and you're not allowed to exit before viewing a short film regarding tourism in Norway. And then we tried to eat at the Dining Nemo restaurant with the squid, but it was booked 6 months in advance. Also, our feet hurt after walking from Canada to Mexico.
We found a glass Stitch with a guitar in Mexico.
We're still pissed at Lt. Dan.